My house part 2

My house part 2, originally uploaded by hammadin.

Another view of the house....The long driveway beyond the gate served as a good [playing ground for fiercely fought cricket matches.....

My house

My house, originally uploaded by hammadin.

Lke your street you childhood house is also special. WHile the form (which you can see in this picture) of the house is great ---its your family ( i.e. the SPirit of the house) who make it very special. This two storey house is of red brick construction....

Goats

Goats, originally uploaded by hammadin.

The Festival of Abraham (EId) is on Friday and while there are sellers who have major bazaars there are also sellers who venture into residential areas to sell goats. Four such goats are seen here. We have bought shares in a cow and my brother is sacraficing a goat.

My street

My street, originally uploaded by hammadin.

A view of my street. NO matter where I live-the meories of the sreets I grew up in is priceless. Walking through these streets is always a special experience.

Manhole hazard

Manhole hazard, originally uploaded by hammadin.

Right around the corner from my house there is a mahole ( about 6 feet deep) which lies open presenting itself as a dangerous proposition for those who are not careful walking at night. Dont worry I will be posting pictures of better things in Pakistan-there are many....

Gas heating in Pakistan

Gas heating in Pakistan, originally uploaded by hammadin.

I am here in Pakistan now. It being winter here means that we use natural gas heaters for heating. The picture shows one such heater. It perhaps not the safest thing in the world but given the concrete houses it is not too bad--as long as you dont sleep with a heater "on" since it can go off if there is load variation. Having said that, I do miss Central heating!

My thoughts: Muslim girl Death in Toronto

Some of you might have heard of this death in Toronto already:

Peel police said this morning that she died overnight.

Friends at the victim’s school said she feared her father and had argued over her desire to shun the hijab, a traditional shoulder-length head scarf worn by females in devout Muslim families.

This is very sad and may Allah SWT bless the soul of the deceased. There are two issues here: wearing of hijab and the other is raising/disciplining kids. There is a fat chance that these issues will be intermingled by the media . While some efforts have to be made to deal with the media , that should not be the main priority. The question the Muslim community should ask is "Why?" and see what long term measures can be taken to solve these issues. Of course it is unrealistic to expect a unified voice from the very diverse Muslim community but even at the level of every mosque questions need to be asked and answers should be sought out. How can we stop this from happening?


I remember being in a masjid sermon 3 years ago where the imam talked about how parents only start worrying about their kids practices once they it their teens. The problem is that lots of Muslim immigrants are used to large extended families-social networks and Muslim societies which facilitate the upbringing of the kids. So perhaps there is less onus on them on a day to day basis. The society takes responsibility. however if you import the same less intensive child rearing skills to a country like Canada where the social networks (specially for new immigrants) are not as extensive as their home countries-then there is a problem. If a new immigrant wants their kids to be the same way they would if they were growing up in their "home" country they are just setting themselves for disaster. They need to adjust-and they need to do it quick.

If a situation like this does arise where a daughter does not want to wear hijab and is being threatened by her parents into wearing it then she should have people she can go to who understand the family's cultural and religious context. This is where the problem of not enough "Muslim volunteers" in community support groups comes up. We need to have a presence in these groups. I remember talking to people who work at youth shelters who said that they usually dont know how to deal with muslim youth's families ( when Muslim kids walk into the shelter) and dont have any muslim volunteers who would be able to help them deal with cultural/religious issues at hand. Perhaps mosques should have a role in this as well and at least educate the people who come to the mosque on child rearing, rights of children, rights of parents, etc. At a recent local muslim event a a masjid volunteer uncle stood up and talked about the HUGE domestic abuse problems the muslim community is silent on.

Anyways-there is a lot to say but also a lot needs to be done. In the end we should not despair-this by the will of Allah and is a wake up call for us. Will we the muslim community rise up to the challenge? Or will we forget about it once this doesnt remain a media story? Or will we wait till we see these problems first hand? perhaps with our own kids?

Saying the good

Sh Faraz says that saying the good not only means saying what is good in itself but also saying that whose consequences are good.

Reflecting on this, I can recall times in my life where I have said the right thing at the wrong place and/or to the wrong person. The consequence of saying the good at the wrong place can be negligible or negative.

So in essence we should say the right thing at the right place to the right person. Saying the right thing requires knowledge. Knowing the right place requires wisdom. Knowing if it is the right person requires novice and insight as to who you are talking to.

The right person could be the right person to talk to in one venue and the wrong person to talk to in another venue. For example, if you criticize someone in public it is more likely that they will be come negitive and defensive then when you talk to them in person. Further, what you to say to a 15 year old is different from what you ay to a fifty year old so watch who you are talking to and word yourself accordingly. Sometimes if someone else says the same thing as we do to our target listener, he/she may be more effective. So we should really weigh what we say.

As the hadith goes:

"Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day should say [something] good, or he should keep silent." [Bukhari, Muslim, Ahmad, Tirmidhi, Ibn Majah]

Nawawi says, "This hadith is quite explicit that it is imperative to not talk unless the speech is good, which is that wherein there is some benefit. If a person is in doubt as to whether there will be any benefit, then he should remain silent."

Punjabi Wise Saying 4

aag nal ag naheen bujdhee
Fire is not put out by fire
(Anger is not put out by anger).

Recently, there was a fire down the street from me. Passing by the house while the firefighters were hard at work, , I wondered hat would have happened if the fire fighters had lit another fire to try to put out the original fire. Of course that would have been silly!

Similarly, in our daily lives we encounter many situations, where we might anger someone. It is easy to get angry in response but the better or the more sunnah way (i.e. "tmsw") is to remain calm and deal with the issue at hand (i.e. burn the fire out with proper chemicals).

Also having done a safety course where they asked us to put out simulated fires, I learnt that the proper ay to put out a fire is to aim the "fire extinguisher: at the root of the fire. So in real life you would aim your response to the root of the issue and if you cant do that at that point, then it is better to remain silent till you have the composure to analyze the issue at hand.

To get a better handle on the issue of anger, you can read my previous post on anger.