South Asian Parents...

This interesting article in the Christian Science monitor reminded me of South Asian parents. Inferring from the article they are not the only ones who interfere in their kids lives when it comes to major decisions like marriage and the choice of career but I do think there is a likelihood that they do it more than parents of other ethnic origins.

The fact they have so much say in their kid's lives could be for the following reasons:

• They help their kids with their tuition as much as they can---again I argue that they go out of their way to do this--perhaps much more than parents from other cultures
• They just care about their kids too much--for example a first year student who came to Waterloo this year had his dad with him for the 1st week just so his dad could make sure that " beta" ( son) was settling down well.
• Most of my friends who have their parents within a couple of hours from Waterloo send their kids a constant supply of prepared frozen meals
• etc etc

Given the support that South Asian parents provide it is probably very hard for the kids to refuse what their parents want them to. What might compound this is the fact that sometimes there is a lack of dialogue and openness between the parents and the kids......Meaning that even if the kid disagrees he/she wont say anything....Cause even expressing disagreement would lead to displeasure from their parents!!

I know at least a couple of people who did their 1st degree in some subject their parents wanted them to study and then did a 2nd degree in what really interested them! Of course these people were lucky. Most people would just finish the 1st degree and start a career in something that did not interest them in the 1st place...Leading to a stalled career..??? Maybe? Of course there is always a chance that they gained interest in what they were doing while in school...Or they weren't so sure themselves so they just went along with what their parents told them to do....

Also the article referenced above makes a point that is so true for South Asian Parents:

"Too many of my friends see their children's success as their own, especially if
they've stopped working or scaled down their own career paths to devote more time to family. They can't always separate what is theirs, and what is their
children's. That's a dangerous and unhealthy path."

There is a positive trend specially among Second Generation South Asians who are more open to what their kids do and of course there are always exceptions even with 1st generation parents.....

Well at least I know one thing that I dont want to be doing to my kids....